Why do I feel like self-sabotaging my relationship?
Key points. People self-sabotage love for various reasons, like fear, poor self-esteem, trust issues, high expectations, and inadequate relationship skills. To avoid getting hurt in relationships, people engage in a number of strategies, such as withdrawal, defensiveness, and attacking their partners.
What does self-sabotage look like in relationships?
“If you self-sabotage, you tend to put up barriers to intimacy,” she said. “This might look like being hypercritical, unassertive, picking fights, being overly distrusting or jealous, needing constant reassurance, and so on.”
Are You self-sabotaging your own relationship?
In relationships, self-sabotage is when you’re actively trying to ruin your own relationship or make it fall apart, whether consciously or subconsciously. For some people, this is such an ingrained behavior that it can be hard to even recognize, let alone stop it.
How do I stop self-sabotaging myself?
Before you can undo an unhealthy behavior, you have to understand the function it serves. If you want to stop self-sabotaging, the key is to understand why you’re doing—what need it’s filling. Then get creative about identifying healthier, less destructive ways to get that need met.
Why do people self-sabotage?
For many, especially those who have experienced childhoodtraumaor unstable familial relationships, such insecurities can lead to self-sabotaging behavior. Psychotherapist Mercedes Coffman, MFT, refers to the concept of emotional memoryfor understanding why this occurs.
Why do people sabotage a perfectly healthy relationship?
Although often subconscious, there are several reasons someone might want to sabotage a perfectly healthy relationship. One big reason is low self-esteem and self-worth, according to clinical psychologist Maggie Dancel, Psy.D.