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How do you respond when someone calls you defensive?
Simply say “OK.” A person says ‘stop being so defensive’ because they believe their good intentions are being misinterpreted. They just want to be heard by you. Whether you want to hear them or not, the best thing you can do is just shut up for a minute and let them get whatever they have to say off of their chest.
What is defensive behavior in the workplace?
Defensive behavior happens when someone perceives they are being threatened and in turn, behave in a way to protect themselves.
What is a defensive response?
To be defensive is to react with an overprotective mentality so a situation that perhaps doesn’t warrant it. Defensiveness is an impulsive and reactive mode of responding to a situation or conversation. Rather than listening with an open heart, we respond with our metaphorical shields up and weapons drawn.
How do you deal with a defensive person at work?
Ask a Candid Boss: How Can I Provide Feedback When My Employee Gets So Defensive?
- Don’t Forget to Praise.
- Do Emphasize Your Intention to Be Helpful.
- Don’t Criticize Reactions.
- Do React With Understanding and Compassion.
- Don’t Escalate the Situation.
- Do Be Open to a Conversation.
- Don’t Criticize in Public.
Why does my boss get defensive?
Keep in mind that many bosses act defensively because they feel threatened in some way, i.e. they feel like you’re challenging their authority, competence, or ability to run the team. Reassuring your boss that you understand and respect his or her position of authority in the situation.
How do you respond to a defensiveness at work?
I’m trying to be helpful.” Reacting to your employee’s defensiveness with frustration will only make things worse. This person is having a hard time hearing what you’re saying. Saying it even louder or more clearly won’t help. But don’t backtrack either.
How can I avoid a defensive reaction to my boss’ questions?
For example, if you normally react defensively when your boss begins peppering you with questions about your actions, you can combat those feelings of being challenged and threatened. With a little preparation — such as vowing to take a moment before you respond — you can learn how to avoid a defensive reaction.
What to do when someone gets defensive when you criticize them?
So, when somebody gets defensive, it’s tempting to give up. But, it’s your job to figure out how to get through. Here are some do’s and don’ts to help you provide criticism. Make sure to mention the things this person is doing right. Offer both praise and criticism so that the person hears both.
What happens when you get defensive in a relationship?
Getting defensive with friends, your boss, your partner, and yourself often backfires. It pushes people away, makes us look immature, and sends a message that we’re unable to regulate our emotions. In the moment, getting defensive can feel like the only way to cope with threat. But in the long term, it undermines us and our relationships.