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What to do if the high expectations of your parents put you under a lot of pressure?
Explain that you’re worried you can’t meet their expectations. Tell them what you see for your future, even if the answer is “I don’t know.” Proving that you’re thinking about what’s next – even if you’re not sure – might make them feel more secure. Listen to what they have to say.
Is it good to pressuring your child?
Pushing kids to excel can damage their self-esteem. The constant stress to perform interferes with children’s identity formation and causes them to feel like they’re not good enough—or even that they will never be good enough.
How do parents expectations affect student performance?
Students whose parents hold high expectations receive higher grades, achieve higher scores on standardized tests, and persist longer in school than do those whose parents hold relatively low expectations (Davis-Kean 2005; Pearce 2006; Vartanian et al. 2007).
How do high expectations affect teens?
Expectations of bad behavior may change the way that parents interact with their teens. They may project more tension, anger, or frustration that may lead to poorer quality interactions between teens and parents.
What do you expect when you go to college?
I expect for myself to learn and be independent after I’ve adapted to college life, and also to be able to do things on my own in the absence of my parents. My second expectation would be that college will help me open doors to new opportunities and to ensure a security of a better future for myself.
Are parental expectations ever a good thing?
A necessity that requires attunement. While teaching a parenting class to a group of counseling students, the question came up whether parental expectations were ever a good thing. The consensus in this class of young adults was that parental expectations have a debilitating, shaming effect on children with emerging identities.
Do expectations come out of parents’ attunement to their children?
The answer to this dilemma might lie in whether the expectations emerge out of the parents’ attunement to their child’s unique interests, tendencies, and temperament. As parents, we can’t escape having expectations.
Why are parents too accepting of their children?
Our hopes for their future are inextricably linked to our hopes for our own future. When parents are too accepting of whatever their child does, it communicates that the child does not really matter. Children know this because when something that matters to them goes awry, they get upset.